journey of a blessed family

I don't even know where to start...I've delayed in starting this post for several hours because I can't quite put it into words yet...Yesterday was ______ ? I don't know how to describe it...beautiful, emotional, touching, sad, happy....so many things mixed into one. We toured G's city--which according to the guide is VERY small (45,000 people?), but to us, it looked like a bustling city. I think S and I both were thinking it would be rural because we'd heard 'small', but it wasn't. We drove through 'rural' for a few hours between Nanning and Qinzhou--farmland, rice fields, water buffalo, pretty scenery--but the city itself looked like a city...the buildings weren't as tall as Nanning or Beijing, but there were still blocks and blocks of buildings, storefronts, hotels, banks--regular city stuff--McDonalds :-) And LOTS of people, cars, bikes...

We visited the orphanage first...Ms. Huang met us outside and we had been told ahead of time that we could not come in...only see the outside, but it was very windy and COLD and so Ms. Huang took us upstairs to a conference room with Hot Tea! Bless her! We had the privilege of meeting a little boy who's forever family was just identified last week--the new mom (from Spain) had emailed me on Tuesday to ask me to inquire about her son and Ms. Huang arranged to have his foster mom bring him to the orphanage while we were there. So, we were able to take several photos and video clips which I have happily forwarded on to his mom. (Many of you probably remember that I had the same joy of receiving surprise pictures of G last year when my bloggy friend, Mrs. Ladyblog, visited Qinzhou with her new daughter....I was honored to pass on the tradition!)

G had fun running around the conference room with his new little friend and he also decided he wanted to be the photographer, and he claimed our little flip video camera. (he thinks it is a still camera though and so he points it, presses the 'on' button and then drops his hand so every video he takes starts out well, but ends up filming his pants or shoes or the floor--before we could forcibly remove the camera from his little tight grip about 20 minutes later, he had taken more than 50 1-5 second videos!! )

G recognized Ms. Huang and knew where he was, but was not the least bit upset about being at the orphanage...he didn't cling to me or S; he didn't cry when we got there or when we left...I don't really think he cared one way or the other that we were there? Not sure if that's good or bad or really doesn't matter. We had discussed with David and Ms. Huang earlier in the week whether we could meet the foster family, but Ms Huang said his departure from his foster family had been very traumatic on Monday and that he had screamed and cried in the car to Nanning to meet us, so they felt like since we were off to a positive start during our 'harmonious period' that they didn't want to damage that bond that we had begun to form. I understand their viewpoint and while a bit disappointed, do agree that things are going well with us and I don't want to jeopardize that either. Perhaps we can get in touch with them sometime in the future...we will send pictures and updates to the orphanage, maybe the foster family will send some things back.

Next stop after our goodbyes at the orphanage, was G's 'Finding Spot' and this, by far, has been the most difficult part of the trip for me yet. I was very tearful when I got out of the van and stepped foot on the pavement that my son had been left on...I imagined him at just a few weeks shy of a year old wandering around crying for his mother...on a busy, city sidewalk just a few feet from passing vehicles...Oh, the heart wrenching experience it had to be for him....and for her...As a mom myself, I can not fathom the pain that comes with deciding that you can no longer care for your sick child and to realize that you can not lean on family, friends, or even government support to help you through...To come to the decision that the best, and only, thing you can do for your child is leave him.....I could just barely take it. As I was holding him tightly and crying and the dam was about to burst, my sweet husband looked at me and said, "but he was found!" Praise God--he was found!! First by a kind police officer who took him to be cared for at the orphanage...next by a kind foster mom and family who have loved him for more than 2 years and now, found by us...his forever family! I pray that someday in the not too distant future that his final 'finding' will be when he learns of and discovers the one, true God who loves him and wants to be his real 'forever baba'...Praise God--he was lost but now he's found! He was abandoned but now he will be loved and cared for...We are truly blessed--the whole family!


[I'm pausing again for a bit while we go to visit the Minority Village....more to come...love you all]